THE FOOL

(BJORK+ZERO7 set the tone...)

As I was unpacking my bag tonight from a lovely few days in Montreal, I discovered something amazing in one of my boot bags... I have NO idea how it made it's way there since it's home is always on or in my dresser. BUT. somehow someway one of my beautiful tarot cards was sitting in the bag waiting for me to discover her...

Which card?

THE FOOL... Note the words that correspond with the image and then the translation:

The Fool is off on an adventure. She wants to cross the river walking on her hands. The cat is testing the water to make sure it is not too deep to cross. The Fool wants to see the aminita muscara mushrooms on the other side. The mushrooms are deadly if approached incorrectly. The pygmy crocodile already warned the Fool of the possible dangers. The Fools only possessions is a bag of TRUTH painted with an OPEN EYE. She rings the bells and shakes the peacock feathers to call on the Goddess. The Goddess comes as a griffon-vulture to bless the journey at the beginning of the NEW DAY.

Translation:

The Fool lives in a world where EVERYTHING is possible. She is the Goddess's special and favorite child. The Fool is a Sacred clown who breaks the SOCIAL CONVENTION, Open Hearts and Stands closest to the spirit. She represents the PURE impulse to ACT and CREATE no matter what ANYONE says. This energy reminds us to be AWAKE and OPEN to possibilities at EACH MOMENT...

Now I am a believer. PERIOD. And one thing I believe in is that it is important to stay very aware in life. To keep your pencils sharpened at all times... The more that we listen, the more that we open the eyes in our souls and start looking out through them rather than just our eyes, the more perfect we can TRUST what we see. We start to see life through a vision where we are able to guide ourselves and our lives to higher ground... OR that's just how I SEE it anyways... I choose to take my beautiful Fool surprising me with its random hiding place as a message and reminder of where I am at with myself, with my life and what direction I am dancing towards within it...

Montreal served me some wonderful time with friends, some new, some special forever... I had the pleasure of some beautiful alone time as well to walk through the cold streets with my music and mind... A few of my gathered cafe thoughts that came to life while sitting on some breakfast dates with ME, with my music and a BRIGHT window to look out of...

Alone. Mind wanders. Hands follow... Sitting, waiting, hoping, thinking, loving, wondering, breathing…

I love to be in transit. I love to be one with the wind… going, coming, leaving, always moving and keeping things FRESH…

Its a strange but powerful feeling to KNOW in the depths of your SOUL that you were born to discover... Discover truth. Discover love. Discover pain. Discover inspiration. Discover people and places that will bring fourth color into your life... I know that I was born to roam... Roam this earth and be moved by the experiences I gain while doing so. I have been touched by many places and yet somehow I FEEL where I will ultimately call HOME. I see RICH. Rich that does not stem from currency but rather IDEAS. Ideas that will come to fruition. I will celebrate them when they develop. I will have EARNED it. Earning is a gift within its self. We are so lucky when we can recognize life's simple treasures. The ones you can't ever touch but can touch you for the rest of your life...

In love. With the world that walks by mine and entertains my thoughts... MUSIC. Is always the backdrop that binds it all together. Mystery. Is scratching at my heart. Clawing. Away at it, waiting for it to bleed but all that leaves me is curiosity... Solo. This is where one learns the most. Confrontation. Leads the way into my soul... I face her. With open arms... We meet eye to eye and know that we are in love... Perfect love. Perfect trust. I'm melting. Melting into a sea of opportunity... I swim. In the depths of what CAN be and what WILL be... There is NO such thing as what should be. I move. Into action. Action that propels me into the sky. The sky. Where limitless opportunity exists... And ohh do I desire... Slowly. But in PERFECT time. It all makes sense in a very obscure manner... What a gift. To be able to read between the lines. To understand the misunderstood. To believe. To move to the rhythm of instincts. To trust. To have total trust.... This is a place where my soul showers me with love and RESPECT... What a PURE place to exist... (then it was time to eat)

Oh and I fell in LOVE in Montreal too. His name is Kees Van Dongen. He left me with chills all over my body, and outrageous inspiration... Art truly is a UNIVERSAL language and I find it so incredibly sexy...

Only the great masters of style ever succeeded in being obscure... EXACTLY. I love you Oscar Wilde...

XRX

LAZY WITH LOLLIPOPS

I will start this little treasure of mine with the feeling of being a child sneaking candy and scrumptiously indulging in it while in my closet... tee hee...  Yes I should be going down my list of things to do and crossing a few items off of it but instead I lit my candles, turned up my Zero7 and kicked my feet up on the couch. My hands are anxious to meet my mind for a date so they may day dream and explore together... so here they are and off they go...

It was a New Moon yesterday which by the laws of astrology it is a great day to start the new... new relationships,  new projects and plant gardens... the energy of the New Moon is BIRTH and its metaphor is Spring... my favorite season, my BIRTH season actually...

I definitely had an amazing day out in the desert shooting with a new team and client. The pictures (rough shot posted) speak for themselves as all good pictures should... 

The weather in the desert was gorgeous.  It was sunny, about 73F/23C, with a perrrfect breeze of wind and when I say perrrfect I mean it just as it sounds... the wind was purring all over the sharp silence of the desert offering a peaceful sexiness to set the tone of our shoot.  New relationships developed and talent was shinning through out the day.  There were a few moments where I found myself staring out into the vast openness of dry, crackled land, sitting under soft clouds painted over a blue sky and thinking, "I am so grateful"... I honestly LOVE... 

I could have put a million things after that word but you know what plain and simply that is the most important part of what ever it is that I would be addressing. LOVE.  That is the point. 

I feel very fortunate to be able to pursue my ART.  It offers so much to me... From the explorations of everything like history to nature, from people to places, from challenges that GROW me, to accomplishments that become timeless... Its as if I came full circle with my ART and because of it I am rewarded with the simple and priceless confirmation that following my instincts and NEVER doing anything outside of my passion was the path I was born to ride.... and what a ride it has been... what a ride it continues to be...peaking left and right with moments of trials down the middle to keep everything balanced... after all there is NO such thing as FUN with out BORED, Happy with out Sad, CONQUER with out CHALLENGE... 

Today was a new day.  A day that brought some challenge.  A day where my positive outlook on life still stood strong but rather than "looking to the bright side of things" I found that nothing made me feel better than a big F!*%K YOU! to my challenges... Ahhhh it was such a nice release.... I think so long as one continues to trust and believe in the good will of the universe on their side and in the choices they make, I feel every now and then, in those moments of steam wanting to burst the lid open,  it can be ultra satisfying to just sign it all off with a big FKUC YOU and send it away. Why Not?  It worked for me.  The end result?  A relaxing evening at home dishing up a tasty piece of salmon over greens with some Norwegian chocolate for desert and some much needed laziness that gave BIRTH to this little collection of words....

Leave it to a Gemini to be productive while being Lazy...

Candies finished for now so it's bed time... hee hee... 

xXx R

Illuminé

The Guitar and the Piano... Lingerie and Champagne... Lipstick and EYElashes... Tuberose... Splashes of Sunshine with a swirl of Brisk air... Girl talks and Giggles (ok CACKELS)... Rouge Vin and my favorite Lentils... French men behind cameras... Words of Encouragement from MAMMA... Decades of Fashion History... a GIFT that left me speechless... In short a few items that sprinkled my day with love, fun, and INSPIRATION...
I am so grateful to have people in my life that I love and that I am inspired from on a daily basis. I am so grateful to personally be involved and witness the lives to some of the most amazing existences on this planet.. my friends and family... Its so important to have people in your life that you can celebrate life with... Exchanging the ENERGY of Love and Trust with each other... Laughter is another thing that I cherish and value so much and today I shared a lot of it with some of my dearest...
My songs play on Repeat... each time as if it was the first I heard it today... bringing fourth the rhythm to my typing fingers and the flow from my thoughts... I have to PEE and don't want to move from where i am... I just want to keep going... So here I GO...
Fascination is word that this logophile loves and the definition of this word seems to paint my mind at the moment... I feel TOUCHED... MOVED... by this unraveling mystery of mine called LIFE... everyday presents something NEW and lately because my state of consciousness is lifted, I am finding that the pieces of my puzzle are unfolding more beautifully as it comes together... There are still areas that want to create FEAR, Doubt, NEGATIVITY.. all of those disease infested feelings that I WANT NO PART OF... nor would I give in to... I have NO room for them in this beautiful puzzle of mine... No I would much rather stay RIGHT where I am and through those turbulent moments find Stillness...
What a place to be...STILL...Stillness a place that many have a hard time finding, or have a hard time trusting to act in... Stillness is a place where one can find harmony when life is producing NOISE... I discovered this place once I finally found trust in my relationship with our beloved Universe... DEEP? Yes... HOWEVER. Better to be DEEP where there is mystery than at the SURFACE where you are seen right through...

There are so many things I can write about... For some reason today I was inspired to stay inspired so here I am... with the depth of my emotions and thoughts... one by one popping up on my screen as they leave my mind to dance in front of my eyes and flirt with me... Its a fantastic relationship my writing and I... a life long romance really... and the most amusing part of it is it's audience... ME...
By now I must tell you that I had to Pee :) Did I have to tell you that? Well it's only ME...The night is wrapping and I am gearing for a new piece of day tomorrow...I will lay my head down on my pillow and float in thought before I finally drift into my unknown... my unconscious mind grabbing at things to twist at them and then bring them fourth to me shortly after... Dreams... talk about Fascination? Dreams pretty much live on Fascination Street in my mind.... I try not to submit too much to them for they can take advantage of you if you let them... nope. instead I simply think them through... some I keep, some I throw away, some I only nibble at, others are lost causes... Dreams can come True... I prefer to keep my DREAMS ALIVE everyday I LIVE and strive towards the illustrations and music I see and dance to in my Future... the Future is NOW... Et maintenant son heure pour mon lit...
xx R xx

Valentinus

Cupid, Conversation hearts, Chocolates, Diamonds, Roses..........

Another meaningful Hallmark holiday bestowed upon us festive Americanas....

Why Not?  Why not have a day to remind the ones we love most with gifts and love letters...

Well on that note I think I would like to send a little love letter to thyself...

To some Diamonds are a girls best friend... To this girl her inner soulmate is who she counts as her better half so let me spoil myself with some delicious thoughts of love?

Its a sunny, brisk day here by the beach.  I woke with a smile on my face and in my heart after a nite of Salsa dancing... I took myself out on a date to some random salsa nite and allowed myself be lead by a handful of fun salsa dancers... All showing me different methods while I cracked up being twirled left and right... People I would probably never meet under other circumstances but in this case... fashion did not matter, the status of the venue and people in it made no difference... it was actually very liberating and felt so good knowing that I was doing something for ME. Needless to say I am hooked and will be shaking my hips to latin beats across many dance floors this year... It's going to be amazing when I can actually get down the way I envision myself doing it in my mind :)  Dancing is linked to one of the most important entities in my world.... Mi Musica...

Most who know me know that next to surfing, my Music and I have always been in a loyal, loving, and devoted marriage... Oh Yes... She is one of the very reasons that I moved to NYC... She is what used to keep me locked up in my bedroom as a young girl day dreaming...

She has moved me on many dance floors around the world... 

At times when driving (a great time for phone calls in LA) I can't break from my music to answer calls that come to me... In other words ladies and gentlemen... I am a SLAVE to my Music... 

SO with that said I think I will dedicate this Valentines day to my beloved MUSIC...

For she has never betrayed me, She has always been there for me, She is a constant source of Inspiration, She has been the connector to many of the most important people in my life, She has given me the most INCREDIBLE experiences to which I could NEVER explain here in words... She is a labyrinth of worlds that offers me limitless opportunities of AMAZINGNESS...  

There is a science to the way music effects people... I feel GIFTED to have her infect me as she does... I feel LOVED... What a perfect day to recognize that?

Appreciation floats around me... Colors are all I can see... 

Having quite days like today where I can go inside myself to flow with my thoughts, journey through my mind, and let go of the outside... I find myself in LOVE and so grateful for all that that I love and all that LOVES me...

My kisses have wings and they are finding their way to my beloveds as we speak... 

JOUR DE VALENTINES HEUREX... xxROXYxx

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Stimulation

The piano has been seducing me lately... Somewhere through the change of the year I have fallen in love with classical music... I've always appreciated it and from time to time have had it playing in the background... but lately it has been existing more romantically for me than just that... in fact it's role has stepped up from the background to the first sounds in my morning while my coffee is brewing... I think the calming and somehow educated stimulation I feel from classical music signifies the direction I am progressing towards... An eternal child who is fascinated by wisdom and is on a constant journey to obtaining as much of it as she can...

Stay youthful... become wiser... MY MANTRA...

I have always been a lover for wisdom, creation, exploring, accomplishing...

Expansion in those areas are VITAL for me to be ME and feel ALIVE in this LIFE i LIVE...

Today is one of those days where I just want to surrender...

Surrender to my desire to learn and discover...

To color outside the lines...

Let me paint a picture for you...

If I was on an island today and it was raining... rather than sit inside and do my laundry... I would run outside into the trees and search my way through nature as if I was looking for a hidden treasure... moving through the wet trees, listening to the sound of the rain as it dances on them... studying the arrangement of colors that blossom around me... feeling the mud beneath my toes and water from the skies trickle down my face... 

The Illustration in my mind of that adventure is alive to me and that kind of truth just turns me on.... Silly? Maybe?...

As much as I love to be understood I am flattered when I am not... pending the subject of course ;)

Sometimes I really believe that we need to scribble outside the lines in order to grow in life... to break the "code" of tradition and normalcy that we exist in... I admit to being a loyal patron in that department... It keeps things FRESH and INSPIRING for me... 

I am so hungry to learn and be all that I can be FOR ME in this special little life of mine... Its exciting to discover new passions that make my journey in LIFE more stimulating.... 

It's a very powerful thing to know how to feed your own fire....

xx ROXY xx

LOGOPHILE

Yep thats what i am... a total junkie for words... a lover of lyrics, a slave to verbs, nouns and adjectives... It's now officially 2009, the second day into it actually and already a beautiful start...Im writing... Im thinking, Im manifesting, Im seeking, Im committing, and Im pursuing with Jupiter the planet of luck, happiness, expansion, and good fortune all up in my sign this year and has not been since 1997 so you know this is a special visit- I welcome her with open arms and a big heart to LOVE her back all the way...

I can really feel the expansion that will come into play for me this year, its almost like a 6th sense... I can feel the inspiration that will surround me and pour out of me, I can feel the refinement that will shape my world as I desire,  I can feel the travel that will take place, the interesting people I will come across, the knowledge I will bring into myself, and the health I will be living... I can SEE myself on my journey and I can SEE the success through everyday of it... A toast to life, to the journey that lies ahead of me... I am excited to LIVE and that is already success in my book.

Short and sweet is how I'll start my new little pile of thoughts here... there is MUCH to be anticipated from my journal of life so I will stay TUNED and keep a rhythm to my lyrics through 2009...

X8X8X 

FALL IS HERE!!!

Fall officially came when my tour ended... that official date is exactly 2 weeks ago.  since my tour ended i have had 4 days off at home by the beach again... ahhhhh... surfed the very next day of my return and enjoyed my favorite sushi again :) i only had 2 days after returning to the beach before i had to head back to the city...yes... NYC! yay!! a nice short but perrrfect trip to work on a client for Regis and Kelly's show and then just enjoy my time back in the city with Janine, Karen, and Brendan!  Janine made me the most amazing dinner and we splurged on 3 bottles of wine together... FUN is an understatement... Currently Im in Nashville, TN, a new city that I have yet to embark on but one that looks like it will become a more frequent destination in my career.  So many things have taken place since my last stop on tour in Oklahoma City.  The break down: returning home, visit my girls in NYC,a successful ad shoot for MEK Denim, a sore throat, a stress fracture on my foot, going completely brunette and LOVING it :), and a touch down in Nashville where i will be hanging for the next 3 nights to paint on one of my special clients...  

Being on my tour this past summer was an amazing experience meeting so many amazing people and experiencing so many new cities.    I feel stronger than ever (minus the injured foot) as well as more focused than ever.  Love surrounds me and I surround LOVE with me.  Ok this was a lazy entry but there is a good movie on and I have to wake early tomorrow so for now... bon soiree... 

XOX R

LES ETUDIANTS DE VIE...

I loved my day off in New Haven Connecticut, the home of Yale University. 

Janine came in to stay with me-one of the great reasons I love her so much- she's not a lazy friend!

We enjoyed the insanely beautiful weather, the green trees, the beautiful architecture of the school, and each others company of course :)  

The neighborhood was very quant and encouraged me to relax and smile.  Sitting under a campus tree, students went on with there 2nd day back at school while the bells on the clock tower chimed songs.  The sun was happily shining over us partnered by a sweet breeze keeping the weather perfect... I found myself completely content...

After walking and enjoying the day, Janine and I returned to my cozy hotel room for some girl talk, red wine, and eyeliner before we met up with Matty for dinner.  We ate next door to our hotel at a tapas restaurant called "BARCELONA", a gift from the food gods to set an amazing tone to our night. 

We enjoyed some sexy food, gorgeous wine, and lots of laughs. THe vibes  stirred up our desire to continue into the night.  Being that it was a Friday night in New Haven college town how could one resist?  We didn't. In fact we gathered more troops and headed to a dueling piano bar on the corner.  Now the minute they wanted to charge $5 at the door, Janine and I looked at each other and said "NO".  With a little nudge from our friends, we forked over the first "entry fee" both Janine and I had paid in um.... years...

Walking into the place I was quick to notice the college fashion crowding the room.  Polo shirts or bland button downs on the guys and the standard "cute top" and denim on the ladies... clearly not presenting any sense of the word "hip", however I believe this helped to set the tone on what turned out to be a fantastically fun night.  Sometimes those random spots that you would NEVER be present at can present some fun surprises.   Before we departed this live, karaoke piano playing bar, I had a friend go up and perform a song, another friend perform "how to steal a shot from a drunk beer bellied college girl" on stage, while the rest of us stayed back hooting and singing along to all of the nonsense being played.  Awesome.  I truly felt like I was in school minus the over consumption of nasty liquor that plays a big role in those years.   The night ended peacefully and with solid memories of good times in Yale's home town.

I have a lot of respect for knowledge and am quite addicted to obtaining limitless amounts of it moving forward in my life. Maybe this is why I used to love to read the encyclopedia as a kid? School is one way of receiving it but not always the best way for everyone...

I did get high grades for most of my younger years in school and then suddenly became bored with the redundancy of how school operates so my attention drifted more to surfing, my move to Hawaii,my love for music, and being free... 

Years after high school I find myself more interested in learning than ever before in my life.  I did not run to college after I graduated high school, I ran to the islands and lived my dream... When that dream morphed into a new one, one of living in excitement surrounded by different people and opportunities, I packed my bags and made NYC my home for several years...  At this point in my life I feel I am in the best place to take some classes if I choose to, grasp the information out of the books that I read, make room for more interesting knowledge that makes me a more accomplished person.  Had I have been forced into trying to do that sooner I don't feel I would have truly reaped the benefits of it all, I would have simply wasted time and money... 

Being around one of the greatest university's reminded me that following my instincts was the best thing I could have done for my life.  Some people like to plant it in the minds of young kids that if they don't attend school they will be losers.  Quite the contrary... Being street smart and learning how to grow on your own terms of INDEPENDENCE does not equal being a loser in fact I feel it means that from an early age one might have some true insight on how to prioritize in life and carry the ambition to build success in their lives. Who really knows what the "right" way is?  I never cared about the answer to that and still don't, I prefer the sharpest way.  I just think you need to find a purpose and passion in life, explore it and have integrity behind all that you do...  

Inspiration can be found in places least expected and Knowledge comes from a journey not a venue :)

XOX R